Love is not so much a feeling as an act of will.  Sure, it starts as some sort of gushy heart beating madness.  But there will come a time you find yourself yelling at this person you are in love with.  You’ll either yell out loud or you’ll yell to yourself and stuff your feelings (not a method I recommend.) After you’ve yelled a critical number of times, the gushy heart beating madness morphs into a different set of feelings.  And after you have a kid your feelings will morph again, most disappearing into the exhaustion.  For a while.  Quite a while.  Maybe months, maybe years.  And then you’ll wonder where the “love” went.  And then, if you’re aware, if you’re lucky,  a two-by-four will smack you across the forehead and you’ll recognize that love is an act of will, a will to love the person you’ve yelled at and who hasn’t done his/her share of the bills/laundry/kiss-initiating etc for a while. And who doesn’t help with the kids. And who has different priorities.  And who maybe you don’t feel you know all that well after all.  But you will love that person, not because of some gushy madness, but because you decide to love him/her.  You decide.

Next up: the fun of divorce